I Still Believe Kim Walker Smith

Today when I woke up the song I Still Believe was on my heart.  As I listened to the song the words began to overwhelm me and I had to stop what I was doing and allow the music to wash over me.  I had to allow God to do a work in me.  It is so easy to sing a song and even to feel and be moved by the power of the music but it is another to dwell on the words and say do I really believe them?  Do I believe that God is still powerful?  Do I still believe that God keeps His word?  Do I still believe that He is sufficient and can meet my every need?  Do I still believe He can heal the deaf ear and open the blind eyes?  Do I fully trust God?

I realized as I tried to type this post that no I was not fully trusting God.  I believe this was the song God wanted me to share today but I struggled to find the right words to put in this post.  What message was I to share when I had not fully understood the message myself?  I had to take time to finish allowing God to speak to me.  I realized fear was holding me back.  I was afraid I had stepped outside of God's timing on a situation and had messed everything up.  That I was either trying to place myself or I had not heard God in that area.  I don't know about you but every time fear raises its ugly head I start to doubt that I hear from God.  Not only do I doubt I hear from God I fear that His promise of healing will never come to pass in my life.

I took some time as I was struggling with this post to pray.  I asked for forgiveness if I had stepped outside of God's timing and to fix any mess I may have made of the situation.  I also prayed and declared that God's word is true, even if I do not see a physical healing in my body today I know that God is still willing and able and His word will come to pass in my life.  Last I declared that I do hear from God and I do believe He speaks to me.  As I prayed, praised, and declared a peace settled over me that I knew was from God.  To maintain this peace I may need to make this a daily act for awhile but I know that I will come to a place where the peace will stay, a place where I do not waver in doubt and unbelief, a place where I fully trust God.

God totally knew what He was getting into when He called and chose me.  I was no surprise to Him at all.  He knows how I will respond to His destinies He has spoken over me, that at first I may declare no way!  But over time I will allow Him to soften my heart to His request because I know He only has good plans for me.  My original response of no way is just fear raising it's ugly head because while God's plans are good and to give me a hope and a future they are also overwhelming.

Some who have heard my story about starting this blog are shocked that I argued with God.  I said no way, no how was I doing this.  I had allowed fear to enter.  Fear I would have nothing to say and fear that no one would read whatever I posted. It took months for Him to work on me so I would get to a place where I said okay.  I even recall I was in church one night when God gave me the name for the blog.  Here is my response:  "That is a great name God.  I'll even right that down but I am not doing it."  I even told God no one would read the blog because I wasn't telling anyone.  Well guess what!  That changed too.  I personally like to think that through this whole process God would look down at me, smile, shake His head, and know He was going to have His way in me.  I am so glad He did.

Despite all my fears and short comings I know that God still loves me, He has chosen me, He is doing a work in me, and yes He does speak to me.  As we develop a more intimate relationship with each other I fall more deeply in love with Him.  The voices of fear, doubt, and unbelief are becoming more distant as they are being evicted from my life.

I am thankful for each and everyone of you.  I am thankful that God has connected us physically and/or electronically.  I am thankful that God continues to speak to me and has given me a sensitivity to what He would have me post.  I pray the posts bless you as much as they do me and I pray that you will each fall more deeply in love with God and develop a more intimate relationship with Him.  Pursue and chase after Him because you will find Him. As Bill Johnson's brother stated we need to become hopeless romantic soldiers.  We need to know the aroma of the one we love and desire that above all else.

Today I have shared the song I Still Believe by Kim Walker Smith.  Listen to the words and allow them to change you.  Know that darkness cannot stand in the presence of the almighty God.  May our faith grow in leaps and bounds as we seek Him.

It is good (Matthew West & Leigh Nash

I love spending time with my sisters in Christ.  Every time we get together I am inspired.  And no matter what I feel God has laid on my heart to share in this blog it seems to get changed after we meet.  This morning during our time together we watched the video The Story.  If you have not watched it I highly recommend, such an uplifting encouraging video that brings the Bible to life in such beautiful visual imagery with wonderful music.  All the songs touched and moved me and to be honest I could possibly post a blog about each of the songs but since you probably do not want to read 13 blog posts back to back I chose one.   For now!  I can make no promises for later. 

The song by Matthew West and Leigh Nash Good put to music the story of Adam and Eve.  Throughout the song one phrase continued to be song:  "it is good."  As I listened to the song and heard the phrase "it is good" over and over I was reminded that everything God created He called good.   When I think of God creating man and woman in His own image and calling it good then how can I look at myself and declare what is not good.  How can I allow the negative hurtful words of my past or present be thought or spoken over my life by me?  I know I cannot control others but I can control what I think or say, so why am I declaring words over my life that do not line up with what God says?

If negative words have been spoken over you and you have dwelt on that negativity then today begin to see yourself as God does because He has said it is good.  I know this is a daily walk in my own life.  It is not an easy path to begin to see yourself as God does because we have believed the lie far too long.  Know that you are loved and chosen by a great, mighty, and powerful God.  God looks at us, with His eyes shining full of love, and He says it is good!

Below are the words to the song.  Read them before watching the video below.  They are so powerful.  As humans we want to rewrite history, we want to change out past and make it all sparkling and new but no mater how painful our past God has used it to shape and mold us into the people He wants us to be.  I may still have many lessons to learn and stuff to overcome but with God at my side I can do it because He has looked at me and declared it is good.  Not only does God sees us as good but He loves us with a love that is so powerful and overwhelming.  Just rest in that love today.  Know that God outrageously loves you and He has said it is good!


If I could, I'd rewrite history
I'd choose differently; if I could, I would
I'd leave out the part where I broke Your heart
In the garden's shade, fix the mess I made
If I could, I would

If I could, close my eyes and then
Dance around again; if I could, I would
Be who You adored, why did I need more?
When beauty was not trained to hide behind my shame
If I could, I would.

Can You hear us cry?
Wishing we could turn back time
To feel Your breath when branches move
Take one more sunset walk with You
Must each tomorrow hold
Such brokenness untold?
Can't imagine how You could
See all of me and say it's good

If I could hold one memory
It would surely be how You walked with us
I'd go back in time, untell my first lie
And let love's injury heal in spite of me

Can You hear us cry?
Wishing we could turn back time
To feel Your breath when branches move
Take one more sunset walk with You
Must each tomorrow hold
Such brokenness untold?
Can't imagine how You could
See all of me and say it's good
Say it's good

It is good. It is good.
You still love us more than we believed You could
Could there be something more?
Will it ever be the way it was before?

Can You hear us cry?
Wishing we could turn back time
To feel Your breath when branches move
Take one more sunset walk with You
Must each tomorrow hold
Such brokenness untold?
Can't imagine how You could
See all of me and say it's good

Identity and Inheritance (Unchangeable)

Have you ever noticed that the main area the enemy attacks us is in our identity?  This seems to be a never ending battle in my life.  I recently went through a time of extreme battle in this area. The lies coming against me were rapid fire.  It seemed as soon as I replaced one lie with the truth another would come and then another and another.  It was never ending.  I began to get discouraged and little by little the lies started to become truth.  During this time I would pray, seek God, and look for the truth in His word to combat the lies.  I acted like everything was fine on the outside but inside I was struggling. 

During the midst of this battle my pastor started a series at church on covenant.  In this series he used the illustration of Ziba and Mephibosheth.   Mephibosheth  did not understand his identity or his inheritance and because of that he allowed Ziba, the enemy, to steal his inheritance.  In fact Mephibosheth identified himself as a dead dog to King David, not a very good self image.  I think at times all of us can identify with this mentality and image about ourselves.  We feel unworthy or like dead dogs or grasshoppers.  In other words  we feel small and insignificant, like our life has no meaning, value or worth.

Mephibosheth's low self image may have come because of his disabilities, but if he had totally understood the covenant between his father, Jonathan, and King David then he would have known that despite the disabilities he had a right and a privilege to enter the King's presence.  There would have been a boldness to Mephibosheth instead of a lowly servant mentality if he had totally understood his inheritance and identity. 

One of the reasons the enemy delights in attacking us in our identity is so he can steal our inheritance.  He wants to keep us in a dry and barren place where we feel unworthy, unloved, and totally useless.  A place where we feel we have to perform to earn God's love, to feel accepted by those around us, and earn our inheritance.   In this dry and barren place we begin to become malnourished spiritually and cannot discover our identity or inheritance.  There is no boldness in this place and it is a place we must leave before we can understand what is rightfully ours.

A few days before I heard the message on covenant there was a word spoken during worship practice that a time of release had come. The person who spoke this word did not understand it or why it needed to be spoken, but I knew it was for me.  I was being released into a new level in my relationship with God and I was being released into a place of freedom.  The tether that was attached to me, that only allowed me to go so far before I was yanked back, was being broken off of me.

Both the word spoken and the message were so liberating to me during my time of battle.  I realized as Pastor Stan had said I had stayed in a conversation with the enemy too long and gotten into a place of deception.  A dry and barren place where I could not feel God's presence, where I was identifying myself in how I acted and behaved and not who God had said I was, a place where I allowed my identity to become that of a dead dog.  There was absolutely no life in that dry and barren place and it was time I vacated it. It was time for me to rediscover who God said that I am and to take back from the enemy all that God has given me.

In the dry and barren place I may not have been able to feel God's presence but He was there all the time.  I was the one who moved away from Him and I was the one who would need to draw near to Him again.  What freedom came with that realization.  No more was I going to allow the pressures of this world and the demands and expectations of others rob me of hearing from God and sensing His nearness to me.  As I began the journey to draw near to God I want to say the results were instantaneous, but they were not.  Because God had said He is taking me to a new level with Him, I could not do what I had done in the past and expect new results.  Every time God takes me to a new level I have to discover what will bring me to a new level of intimacy with Him.  There is no set pattern and what works for one will not work for another.  All I can say is don't give up because the end result is so worth it!

To wrap this up I desire for all of you to leave the dry and barren place you may be inhabiting.  Do not become like Mephibosheth and allow the enemy to steal your inheritance and indentity.  Begin to see yourself as God sees you.  Speak those words over yourself, no matter how silly it may seem. Do not allow your present circumstances or situations continue to rob you of all the great and wonderful things God has in store for you.  There is absolutely nothing you can do to earn God's love or to keep you from God's love.  He loves you because you are you!  I recently read in the book Pursued by Jud Whilite a passage this sums this up so well:  "I can finally rest in the fact that I am not good enough for God, but He is absolutely good enough for me."  Such a powerful statement. We are unworthy of God's love yet He loves us, chose us, and has called us by name.  We just need to rest in that.

So do as Romans 12:1-2 says (see below) and give your all to God, you will not be sorry you did.  He has a great and wonderful plan for each of you as Jer 29:11 states.  Listen to the words of the new Matthew West song Unchangeable.  You are not a mistake, God's love for you in unchangeable, and He knows the plans and purposes He has for each of you.


So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. (Romans 12:1, 2 MSG)

Testify To Love

Today I spent time with my beautiful sisters in Christ.  We spent the morning just fellowshiping and loving each other but we also spent time sharing testimonies on how we have changed from a year ago.  During this time of reflection and sharing I started to realize a common theme in the all the messages.  Each woman  has felt isolated, unloved, unworthy.  Each of us longed to discover our worth and value.  What in the world were we placed on this earth to do? 

As the stories unfolded another theme started to arise.  It is the theme of God's faithfulness.  When we cry out to God He is so amazing to answer each of us right where we are.  One after another began sharing on how faithful God was to show them their worth and value.  He was faithful to help them realize where they are weak He is strong!  He was faithful to bring healing and deliverance at a time when it was most needed.

I am beginning to realize that as women we all struggle with accepting and liking ourselves.  We all struggle with discovering what we are good at and what we were destined to do.  The good news is we do not have to struggle.  God is faithful and just to speak to us in our time of greatest pain and need.  If you are asking yourself what good am I?  What am I here to do?  Stop asking the questions and just begin to focus on God and begin declaring how wonderful He is.  As you gaze at Him, He is so good to reveal the answers to the questions you have been seeking.  But be prepared for what He tells you because it will totally blow your socks off!

To finish as I listened to the last woman share today I glanced over at a beautiful flower arrangement and the thought went through my head that the arrangement had all the colors of the rainbow.  That is when I realized that each of us is a Testimony of God's love.  We need to begin to testify to love, His great love towards us.

Thanksgiving (From the Inside Out)

On the first of November I began seeing posts on Facebook declaring 30 days of praise.  Last year I found out about this too late so I made the decision to join in this year. It took me until day two to realize we need more than 30 days of praise, we need to develop a lifetime to praise.  Everyday we should cry out to God in thanksgiving for all the good things He has done.  We should praise and thank him for the love he so lavishly pours out on us.

The bible is full of words of praise and thanksgiving, especially the book of psalm.  I believe the author, David, learned how to develop a lifetime of praise and no matter what the situation or circumstances looked like he praised and thanked God.  Below are a few verses that God laid on my heart to share in this post.

Psalm 100:4 declares that we are to enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.  The message bible put this so plainly:  Enter with the password:  "Thank you!" Make yourselves at home talking praise.  Thank him.  Worship him.

Psalm 107:1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.
The message bible adds something so unique to this verse:  Oh, thank God - he's so good!  His love never runs out.

Just think about that:  God is so good and He has a never ending supply of love for us.  That alone is enough to be thankful for, for a lifetime!  When you combine His never ending supply of love for us along with all His blessings you will discover how truly wonderful our God is.

If we do not begin to thank and praise God the rocks will cry out for us, Luke 19:40.  Personally I do not want the rocks to do what I was created to do.  So instead of doing 30 days of praise begin a lifetime of praise and thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving and praise allow you to access your blessings.  Thanksgiving and praise is the key into entering new levels in the will of God (Steve Fish).  After thanksgiving and praise we will enter into worship.  Worship is the permission to become lost in the rhythm of God's heartbeat (Graham Cooke).

I don't know about you but I am ready to get my praise! 

The song chosen for today's blog is From the Inside Out by Hillsong.  I love the line that states "the art of losing myself in bringing you praise."  May we become lost in ourselves in giving God all the praise and thanksgiving. We need to just totally lose ourselves in giving praise and thanksgiving to God.  Today begin to develop a lifetime of praise, do not just stop giving praise and thanksgiving on December 1 but continue on where every day of your life reflects how good God is.

Secure (Impossible Tricia Brock)

This weekend the ladies from my church and some not from the church gathered together to encounter God.  The night before leaving for this encounter God gave me a word to share with each of you on Your Beautiful Purpose.  The theme this weekend was exactly the same, discovering your purpose and identity and stepping into that.  From the first night I was in awe that God would give me a similar message to those of some amazing other women.

At one point in the weekend each woman was asked to stand up and state a dream that God had given her.
Now for most of this year God has been revealing to me His plans for me so I knew what I needed to say when my time came.  Shortly after this declaration I came under attack.  I kept hearing the words "who do you think you are to do that?"  What had been relatively easy to believe and declare in the privacy of my home became a weapon of attack from the enemy.  That night during worship when I was still struggling with these thoughts God got ahold of me and lovingly reminded me who I was and that yes His plans are bigger than me but they are not too big for Him.

Later that night as I was praying and contemplating on who God says that I am He gave me a word.  The word is "secure."  God says that I am secure in knowing who He says that I am and the plans He has for me.  I had never thought of being secure in all that God has been revealing to me.  I know that He is God and what He says will come to pass but the word secure was never thought of.

When I came home I looked up the meaning of secure as was completely blown away (God can do that to you).  Here are some of the definitions: 

• Free from danger or attack - secure fortress.  Psalm 91:2 states God is my refuge and fortress.
• Free from fear, anxiety, or doubt - 2 Tim 1:7 and Phil 4:6
• Not likely to fail or give away - stable (we can be the rock in the midst of the storm)
• Firmly fastened (just hold on to God and don't let go)
• Reliable, dependable, assured, certain

I also took this a step further and looked up the Hebrew word for secure.  That word is Batach and here are some of the definitions for this word.

• To trust, trust in
• To have confidence, be confident
• to be bold
• to be secure
• to be safe

Two of the words I have been declaring over myself since God starting revealing His plans for me are confidence and boldness.  So when God said I am secure in Him, I believe He is also saying I am bold and confident.

 Why is so easy for each of us to believe the negative yet when God speaks something so wonderful to us we are slow in believing?  Why do we worry about what others think, especially about what God is saying to us?  Today I will boldly declare to you that God has called me to be an armour bearer, He has called me to proclaim the good news of freedom to the captives and to bring them out of the land of captivity into a land of freedom.  A land that is flowing with milk and honey.  Do I know how each of these things will come to pass?  Do I know when I will step fully into these identities?  No!  But I do know that God has spoken this to me and I will stand firm and secure in knowing who I am in God.  Others may not see me the same but as long as God sees me this way I will see myself this way.

 I want to personally thank each of you for taking the time to read this blog and for your wonderful words of encouragement.  I am praying and believing that my openness is helping to bring each of you into a wonderfully more intimate relationship with the one who knows and loves you.  Be secure in all that He is revealing to you and rest in Him until He brings it to pass!


 I found this on Facebook on the Whosoevers page and thought it would bless and encourage you.

•  "I can feel you all around me.  Thickening the air I'm breathing.  Holding on to what I'm feeling.  Savoring this heart that's healing.

 Last what would this blog be without a song!  This song is called Impossible by Tricia Brock.  I love it because it declares that nothing is impossible for God!

Your Beautiful Purpose (I Am Yours Misty Edwards)

Jeremiah 29:11 states that God has plans for each of us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us to give us a hope and a future.

Psalm 139:13-17 (message bible) You shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb.  I thank you, High God - you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration - what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something.  Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day!

Do you not get excited reading the above words?  This is so amazing.  God knew us before our parents came together and before they even knew they wanted a baby.  He took the time to put together a beautiful plan and purpose for each and every one of us (all the days of my life were written in God's book before the day I was born).

No matter what we have believed or thought about ourselves, we are not here by accident.  We were not a mistake our parents made one night because they forgot to use some sort of birth control.  If you have been reading my blogs long enough you will know that for most of my life I questioned my purpose here on this earth.  I felt very worthless and purposeless because I did not posses natural gifts and talents.  I had a failure mentality. 

Thankfully God turned that all around.  When I began spending time with Him he began to show me my beautiful purpose.  It is somewhat overwhelming because what He is showing me is way outside the realm of my ability or talent but the awesome thing is it doesn't matter.  I will step into my inheritance and identity because of the great God that I serve and He is more than able!  There is a verse in the bible that states we can do all things through Christ because He strengthens us. I believe it is the King James version that states we can do all things through Christ because He EMPOWERS us!  Isn't that wonderful!  God gives us the power to walk out His Beautiful Purpose for us.  Think back to all those people in the bible who God had a beautiful purpose for.  Each of them rose up in their negativity and God just looked at them smiled and they stepped into their divine destiny and purpose.  That is because despite their doubts in their abilities they knew the God they served was more than able to work through them.

If God's plan for our lives is something we can do in our own power and ability then we will try to take the credit but if that plan is bigger than us God will receive all the credit and all the glory.   So begin today to seek God just for who He is and as you fellowship with the most amazing, beautiful, and loving God He will turn His face towards you smile at you and begin to reveal His beautiful purpose for you.

God has made each of us unique so don't get discouraged if your beautiful plan does not look like someone elses.  Lance Wallnau said it so wonderfully:  "Be Bold! Be Original! You'll never find your voice trying to fit in somebody else's chorus."

As God reveals His beautiful purpose for your life begin to declare that identity.  Don't allow worry, fear, doubt, and unbelief to keep you from your beautiful purpose.

The song for this blog is a beautiful worship song that I feel God chose for this.  When we declare that we are God's He begins to lavish His love and plans upon us.

God's peace and joy I give to you, guard it and seek it above all else.